December 12, 2006

I haven’t really wanted to make too big a deal about this

The thing is, my attorneys had advised me that keeping mum, refraining from public statements, and generally observing QT protocol would allow things to just sort of blow over.

But for the last two weeks, those attorneys have not been returning my phone calls. And so it looks as though I’m going to trial.

I wouldn’t worry too much. The prosecution obviously doesn’t know their affiants from a hole in the ground. They’re flailing, and I expect the whole thing will be thrown out on appeal. Besides, the judge has it in for me. Remember Judge Webster Thayer, who asked, after sentencing Sacco and Vanzetti to death, “"Did you see what I did to those anarchist bastards the other day?” Well, this is exactly like that. Except that I didn’t get any payroll money. And Sacco and Vanzetti had a happy ending, right? I think. Anyway, I love their ice cream. The spumoni’s especially good.

Anyway, I’m only mentioning it here because it seems I’m about to be tried in the media as is increasingly common these days. The in-jokes they’re using to run this show trial could power the entire town of Elko, Nevada. It’s just wasteful. 

And just when I’d gotten my traffic back down to a reasonable, sustainable couple dozen daily visits.

Comments are closed

I'm sorry, but the comment period for this entry has ended.

And just when I’d gotten my traffic back down to a reasonable, sustainable couple dozen daily visits.

Damn!  You have discovered one of the previously unrevealed parts of your sentence, since there is no possible way you can be found to be anything other than guilty.  And while powering Elko might be a waste, we are also powering Waco and Pahrump just for the show.

The hilarious thing about this fake show trial is how closely it mirrors the real show trial the cops put on for a Amanda a few months ago.

We took our model from the very best, Roxanne.  And remember, it’s not too late to add more charges!  I heard that Playboy was thinking of naming this blog one of the Top Ten Hottest McNatureblogs on the Internets.

Comrade Myers signs his confession before the eyes of the Committee I have been ordered by the Ministry of Justice of the We Are All Giant Nuclear Fireball Now Party to publicly confess my shame and apologize for my grave…

They’re flailing, and I expect the whole thing will be thrown out on appeal

You still don’t quite grasp the meaning of Show Trial, do you? Just lie back, think of England Mount Diablo, and take it like a man. Oh wait, you were whining, weren’t you?

Just remember to smile for your mug shot.  You mustn’t allow a public display of your humiliation and degradation.

In keeping with that, maintain a positive facade at all times.  No matter how badly things are going, insist that you have a plan to win the trial, and the defeatists who whine about body counts are unpatriotic.

You are innocent until proven guilty beyond a reasonable doubt.  If the V.P. can shoot a man in the face and receive an apology from his victim, we can surely get you off from this!

If the defense plays real nice, maybe a certain local bay area Minister will have that poster blown up for you as something rare and unique.  It would, i suspect, make for quite the office titter and tatter should it be prominently displayed above your “Editor” chair.

--blondie-- the following statement are regards this trial is patently untrue on all merits:
You are innocent until proven guilty beyond a reasonable doubt.

Chris Clarke is guilty, will always be guilty, and all that is being determined, through torturous elocutions and other public displays of affection (see Chris in Zeke in previous post), song, chant, poem, and prose, is the depth and degree of his own complicity in his guilt.  WAAGNFNP does not acknowledge guilt, nor, as in the case of Chris, does the party acknowledge hope.  Each would wreak havoc on the underlying foundational principles upon which the party has started (late but well attended): that we need a Global Nuclear Fireball Now!!

I’m a regular reader of both this blog and Michael’s, and I totally don’t get this.  Is there a “show trial primer” one can read to get up to speed on this particular in-joke?

Elayne, reading through the <a href="http://www.michaelberube.com/index.php/weblog/comments/1119/"> trial transcript</a>

now that was a veritable disaster of a messed up posting.  Somehow the preview window erased the text and wouldn’t let me go back to find it.  And damn, if i hadn’t written a nice summation and history too.  Crap.  Anyway, Elayne, please read Amanda’s post 96 in the thread link above for a composite list of the charges.  Then keep in mind the graphic novel, the trolls, the whole Ann Althouse fiasco, and all that is the idiocy of the one whose name we do not text.

the idiocy of the one whose name we do not text.

Who’s that then? I’ll settle for “sounds like...”.

I don’t have the energy to keep up with this, although it does take me back to my student days and fond memories of denouncing, shunning, etc. Good times, good times.

Is there a “show trial primer� one can read to get up to speed

Elyane -
Yours is not to reason why. Yours is to level accusations and be renewed and purified by doing so.
It really is all in Chris’ best interest, you know.

Yours,
Oaktown Girl
Minister of Justice
WAAGNFNP

Rob G,
Re: the idiocy of the one whose name we do not text

Using the Venerable and Ancient Code of the Elders of Poughkeepsie, Avidday Orowitzhay, unless I’m sorely mistaken, in which case, it’s Omebodysay Elseay.

Oh, D-Ho! Even I shoulda known that.

Page 1 of 1 pages of comments

Categories